Wednesday, November 28, 2007

26th November

Today will be a bit more cheery. Not so for Ed who was up all night being ill. I wasn't in great shape. We both blamed the pizza.

We are in Uyuni, a pretty unamazing town with the exception of the most famous and photographed salt flats in the world. First, we visited "the railway graveyard" - surreal on a word. Locomotives, scrap metal, track all left to rust. Took some great sepia photos though.

Our next stop in the 4x4 was a salf factory on the ouskirts of the flats. A bit of a Gringo trap. Some of the guys bought salt shakers made of salt, ashtrays etc etc. The rival tour company to Exodus, Budget Travel, were also there. They are all kids and from what I can tell it is more of a "swinging" mode of transport than ours!

30 mins later we were on the salt flats. We had lunch (chicken, salad, spuds) and then we did what all juvenile tourists do at Uyuni - took silly photos of people coming out of wine bottle, or being eaten by 6 inch high dinosaurs. Let me explain, because the salt flats are, well, white and flat it is really easy to take photos that make the images in the foreground defy perspective and make the image in the background look tiny in comparison. I have added a shot to demonstrate. Also bumped into Steve and Charlie from the Inca Trail and formerly New Zealand. His "travel beard" is looking very impressive. I might grow one! They are camping out on the flats tomorrow and then heading to Buenos Aires.

The sun was baking hot and just like in the snow when you took your sunglasses off it was dazzling. We then made our way to the "salt hotel", again very surreal. Everything made of salt including the beds. Wouldn't want to fall out of that one. We had beer and chocolate and then played one touch football for an hour or so until the sun went down. The sunset was actually disappointing, the previous night's was much better.

We drove back to the town, had more pizza, and cookies and ice cream and discussed places to go in New York.

The salt flats were amazing, something I always wanted to visit since we covered it in Geography in school.

25th November

Today’s activity and indeed the only activity in Potosí is to visit the old silver mines in the mountain “Cerro Rico”. In the 1500s a farmer lit a campfire on the mountain and then saw a river of silver trickle out from the rock. The Spanish got to hear of this and in their own inimitable style raped the mountain for all the any nugget of silver there. Parts of today’s entry are pretty depressing. You have been warned.

Our first stop was to pick up overalls, boots, a helmet and a torch. If the mines were in Britain they would have walkways, strip-lights, a souvenir shop and more health and safety you could shake a stick at. But this isn’t Britain, this is South America. We bought our dynamite from a local shop and presents for the miners who still work there chiselling for zinc and others metals. These included fags made of black tobacco and aniseed, crisps, coca leaves and fuses and more dynamite.

The entry to the mine was fairly narrow – not as bad as the Great Pyramid in Egypt though. Our guide, Madelena, was in flip-flops and no helmet. We walked in the torch-light for about 15 mins and then came across a miner (please note today is Sunday) who was hammering a big chisel into the rock face. A few of us had a go at chiselling but the real fun started when our guide chose a place to blow up with a third of a stick of explosive. The fuse was about a minute and we all nervously waited until BANG – lots of dust, thought my heart was going to explode with the noise but still was good fun.

A shirt walk further and we came across some more miners or perhaps minors would be more appropriate. Two boys, one 17 and one 14 years old. They were covered in dust and told us they have to shift TWENTY tonnes of rubble per day (a 10 hour shift) to get paid 80 Bolivianos (5 pounds). Madelena also told us the youngest miners are 12 and it is common for some kids to die on day one of the job. Death is caused by dynamite or falling down the multitude of shafts some 200 metres deep. The statistic of one injury EVERY DAY is also a pretty depressing one as is the life expectancy of 20.

Six of us did the “adventure” which involved crawling and climbing through the narrowest of tunnels, with sheer drops either side, and razor-sharp rocks above and below. Looking back I wouldn’t do it again.

Mining has to be one of the most evol jobs there is. I was coughing dust for hours afterwards and I spent one hour there. Starting at 12 years old and doing it for every day of your short life must be hell. It is one month to Christmas, you can't help wondering if they will be working that day too.

We left the mine after about an hour and the sunlight was a welcome addition. On the way back we blew up some more rocks with explosive and I now have a 1 minute video of the event. Although I think I might have used the F-word when it went off.

After a quick lunch we drove off to Uyuni. The trip on the truck was about 6 hours – the landscape of Bolivia is pretty amazing and the sunset just before we arrived was spectacular again. The rest of the journey passed without much incident apart from nearly puncturing the diesel tank on a rock.

Our hotel was great. There is a pizza restaurant attached with “proper” pizza, none of the rubbish I have had so far. I share a large meaty with Ed and drank lots of Huari andf then shared an apple pie with Kellie.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

24th November

Went out for drinks and a bite with the tour leaders (Andy/Tubbs) and my new room-mate (Rob). I have also met a number of the tour. Looks like I haven't done my homework as the trip is a bit different to how I had envisaged. All good though. We are on a big bus but only allowed to call it a truck (don't ask). There are 21 folk ranging from 20s to 60s most of whom have been travelling on the same truck in other countries in South America. As you can imagine it had been harding remembering names but I think I am there now (see below). Gutted 3 blokes played golf at "The Highest Golf Course in the World" yesterday and about another 10 did the mountain-biking on the most dangerous road in the world - wanted to do both of these.

We left La Paz at 6am after filling my small locker with my big rucksack on the truck. We also have chores to do on baord (awaiting my allocation) and we have to take turns cooking as well in groups of threes. The truck is fairly cramped but spirits are high. Toilet breaks are fun, we seem to stop at the side of the road in the most picturesque locations. Not sure what the locals think when they turn their heads to admire the view and see 11 women squatting, 10 blokes a-peeing. Thankfully no "gold rings" as yet.

We had lunch "on the run" which was made by the 3 on "meal detail". An amazing production line came up with ham, cheese and salad rolls. Not bad on some of the bendiest roads in South America.

Our one and only destination for the day was the highest city in the world Potosí. The tour guides have coined an alternative name of "Pot-o-shit" and when we checked into the hotel you could see why. I'm sure our room featured on "Carry On Abroad". The city wasn't much better. Nothing was open except tat-shops but we did find a gringo cafe which was quite nice despite the miserable staff.

We are off for pizza tonight at "The Highest Pizza Restaurant in the World". Zzzzzz. These altitude superlatives are really beginning to drag.

Here is the make up of the tour.....

Rob - room-mate, owns lots of pubs in south-west London. Top bloke.
Ian - quiet, looks like a bear
Steve - accountant from up north
Thea - think she is Swedish but the guys have unfortunately dubbed her "man-woman"
Ed - Old boy, looks like Bernard Cribbins
Jacky - Nice, haven't really spoken to her
Jon and Sarah - Rob is new, and his Mrs is well fit.
Tina - Irish and good fun
Karen - New, haven't really spoken to her
Shannon - the other Spanish speaker, very nice.
Connor and Kellie - He is Irish, she is from North America. Both nice.
Derek and Cherry - Both English. Derek is a golfer.
Charlotte - very easy to talk to. A good laugh.
Matthais - German and therefore a bit odd.
Ruth and Chris. Ruth is nice, a doctor. Chris is probably the most anally-retentive control freak I have met on my travels so far.
There is also a new lady (can't remember her name, foreign) who you can already tell isn't going to fit in. She doesn't like diesel fumes, the lack of wake-up calls and the fact that the water is iodine-treated not filtered.

As you might have guessed this is like Big Brother on wheels. Before I joined there have already been blazing rows with the travellers over food, drink, mess, lack of space. I think Archie would call it "a break down in Group Dynamics" I have been looking for cameras most of the day.

Friday, November 23, 2007

23rd November

So I felt great after 2 hours sleep. I found it hard to speak English let alone Spanish to the chap on reception but I explained I would be back to pay for the room and all my stuff was still upstairs. When I arrived at the other hotel I had more luck. But the sly little Bolivian told me he had been there all night. Exodus will be hearing from me later. Found the joining letter in reception. 6pm we meet again. There is a city tour at 10am. Yeah, right. Sleep. Went back to other hotel and dozed until 10. Got up, flooded bathroom floor by accident and checked out.

Did my own tour of the city. The architecture of La Paz is great and all contained in 3 squares, including the main Plaza de Murillo. The people are very friendly and are made up of a high proportion of Aymaras - ie the women who wear the bowler hats and big skirts and are happy to smile most of the time albeit through toothless grins. The city is similar to Quito (but less dangerous) and Cusco in that the suburbs are built on the hills and there are huge mountains overlooking the metropolis. There centre is also polluted as you might expect with the same crammed buses littering the streets and the conductors barking incomprehensible destinations out of the windows. The shops crack me up. There is a street of hairdressers (so I had one, v good and v cheap), a street of photocopiers, a street of money exchangers and a great artesan market and a slightly more sppoky "mercado de brujas" or witchcraft market with llama foetuses, bulls' penises and more herbs that you can shake a stick at. Bought the wrist strap in the colours of the Bolivian flag within 5 mins of shopping - hope you are taking note Peruvians. Also got another badge for my rucksack.

Had lunch in a very nice cafe off the equivalent of Carnaby Street. Huge burger of beef, bacon, egg, cheese, ham and salad. A local beer (Huari) and a cappuccino for 2 pounds 50. The beer was good if a little salty. Dad would surely enjoy it.

Am bang up to date with blog this week so I can't give you the low down on the new tour folk as I have yet to meet them. That will be from tomorrow.

22nd November

This morning we are off to Perú's answer to the Galápagos Islands. The trip to the Ballestas Islands are off the Pacific coast near the region of Paracas. This is also the nearest we will pass the earthquake-hit Pisco home of the "Sours". Left Huachina at 6.30 and got a twin-engine speedboat to the islands. I think it is quite nice the Peruvians are proud of their islands. The snob in me would say they are not a patch on the Galápagos but are a fraction of the price. We saw boobies, cormorants, sea-lions, sea-spiders, pelicans and Humbolt penguins. All good. The smell of guano was like the toilets of the Inca trail and stung the nostrils but makes a very profitable (and timely) export for the people of Pisco. We ere on the water for about 2 hours and the memory card filling up nicely.

Back at the port you had to feel sorry for the inhabitants who were selling, well, tat, just to gather some coins to repair their houses. All very touching. I bought more Inca Kola - I swear I am going yellow.

We headed back to Lima on a public bus. The 4 hours flew by as we watched The Fugitive with Harrison Ford. We arrived early at 2.30pm and I had 7 hours to kill before my flight to La Paz. This meant a Last Supper with the gang. Had a very nice 10 soles 2 course meal with my new favourite Peruvian food - Pollo Saltado which is a bit like chick fried rice. We said our goodbyes to Paúl and I said farewell to Peter and Jane, Ted and Jean. This time tomorrow I will be on a new tour of Bolivia, Southern Argentina and Chile.

Paid 50 soles for a hotel cab to the airport which is a bit steep (just under a tenner) but the cabs in Lima don't have a very good reputation with tourists. Had a mild panic at the check-in when they asked to see my trip itinerary which I hadn't reprinted since it the tours were cancelled. I was amazed when the attendants superior came over and said, "Oh, it's ok, he is a British National". They did clobber me on the international departure tax though - a tasty US$30.

Bought lots of chocolate with my remaining soles and a present for father. The flight was delayed due to over-booking. The staff offered a US$80 pay off for anyone who wanted to be "bumped". You have never seen so many people move so quick.

Sat next to a kid on the flight with "that adolescent smell" - sweat, halitosis and too much testosterone. Flight was quite quick (2 hours) and on landing I got chatting to a local from Santa Cruz called Mariela - very nice, she loved my spanish accent and the fact I lived in Wimbledon, but our paths were not meant to cross again as she was staying on the plane past La Paz. The cash machine was locked up at the airport (which is incidentally like a shed with a few immigration officers and one baggage carousel) but luckily the cab driver took dollars. It was brass monkles at 3400m and had been raining hard.

Go to the hotel at 2.30am and then had major panic when despite many rings on the night bell no one came to let me in. Fair play, the cab driver who could have buggered off helped me wrap on the glass which sounded like it would break at any minute. Then the police came to see what the noise was and even they helped wake up the hotel by tapping on the shutters with nightsticks and, yes, their guns. Still no one came. The cabby took me to another hotel not far and luckily had more success there. A bit steep at Bs120 (1 Pound = 15.5 Bolivianos) especiallyu when you have paid upfront for the former. Now I had a big dilemma. I know the tour leaves tomorrow but I don't know what time. If it is 6am I am going to look stupid turning up at 7. The itinerary on Trailfinders doesn't have a joining time and all the internet kiosks are long since shut up. So I decided to get up at 5.30am and go to the original hotel.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

21st November

Thank God I didn't have dreams about mummies. Nice Americano breakfast. Scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, jam, juice and coffee. Today we are off to Ica, which is proper desert with huge sand dunes and no rain. Ever. There are 6 of us and the best method of transportation for some 120km appeared to be 1960 America cadillacs. Oh yeah! The photos are hilarious. I reckon the boot was as big as my whole car. Our driver's feet hardly touched the pedals but like every other South American his had never strayed too far from the horn.

We briefly stopped at the viewing tower close to 2 of the Nazca lines but the views were poor. We headed straight for Ica afterwards dicing with death a number of times. Our activity for the morning when we reach the oasis of Ica (Huacachina) will be a dune buggy ride and sand-boarding. Both were great fun - the dune buggy ride was like a 30 minute rollercoaster. We had seatbelts fastened between our legs which bruised the Crown Jewels on a number of occasions when going downhill. The sand-boarding was more fun lying flat, head first on the board rather than the more conventional snow-board approach as Peter found the drag off the sand made traversing impossible. We slid down 4 dunes and drove up many more before heading back to the hotel. The best bit about the return journey was flying, literally, over one dune only to reach to sand once more will all of Newton's laws in attendance. Fair play, Ted did the sand-boarding and Jean loved the buggy ride and wasn't sick.

We returned to the garage unbroken and had a great view of the natural lagoon at the oasis. More sunbathing before lunch and then finally got to try proper Ceviche - raw fish in lime, chili, with onion and peppers and corn. It you forget the fact it hasn't been near an oven it is actually a very pleasant dish.

Gutted England are out of the Euro Championships but at least it will be the end of Steve McClaren.

20th November

2 hours sleep and a shower did wonders. This morning we are off to see the Nazca Lines. Here is the history bit...The Nazca Lines are a series of animal figures and shapes none of them repeated and up to 200m long. Each one, such as the spider, monkey, hummingbird is executed in a single continuous line, most created by clearing away the brush and hard stones of the desert to reveal the fine dust below. No one knows their meaning but it is thought they represent an ancient calendar or link sacred paths or huacas (power spots).

The shapes are unrecognisable at ground level which means the only way to see them is by plane. Or Cessna 206 to be precise. In the cockpuit we had Capt. Eduardo and second officer Williams! In the cheap seats behind we had Jean and Ted and Peter and Jane. One of the perks of not being in a couple means you get the best views. I remember the last time I was in a 6-seater. We were in Nelson, New Zealand and I had a parachute strapped to my back!

The take off was smoothand the Capt. didn't require any of my flying experience. We flew about 3000 ft until we got to the lines and then banked hard to the left. Capt. Eduardo's english was basic but with a quick shout of "Man, lady under wing now. It is the spider. You look please." we were taking many a photo. Some of the images I have to say I missed but took the photo anyway.

We systematically went through each shape with shutters opening and closing throughout and then headed for home. Eduardo then unexpectedly said over the intercom looking directly at me "now you fly" and pointed to the controls. After a quick look of disbelief on my face and abject terror on the faces of the other passengers I grabbed the stick and steered towards the airport. Well, I like to think it was towards the aiport but I had enough trouble keeping the plane steady to worry about direction, but I think I did OK and it was a great experience.

Eduardo regained control after about 5 minutes and we touched down safely. Being in the flight seat has the added advantage of getting the landing on video. I'm sure my Mum can't wait to see that! A great morning and one of the best trips I have done in South America. Once on the ground we headed for the giftshop to buy postcards in case the photos haven't come out. Ted was outside and lying prostrate on a bench and it turns out Jean ouked in the sick bag on the flight as well. The editor of this blog would like to point out at this stage that both afflictions were apparent BEFORE Williams took control of the plane.

We went back to the hotel for a lie down by the pool and then headed to Nazca for lunch - chicken stirfry, house salad and beer. It's what us pilots eat all the time. Nazca is a typical Sotuh American town - busy, dirty, lots of dogs, horns blaring and shops selling lots of tat. We were back by the pool by 2pm.

The second excursion of the day was off to the Chauchilla Cemetary. 30 years ago grave-robbers found and pillaged the ancient cemetary at Nazca and left human bones scattered in the desert. Italian and Peruvian archaeologists have since restored 12 of the many graves and propped up the remains of the inhabitants for the fee-paying public. If this morning was exhilirating then this afternoon was certainly gruesome.

The graves contained bones, clothes, baked bodily fluids, hair and ceramics. The mummification process was so advanced (and different from the Egyptians) you could actually still see parts of an eye and a tongue on one poor soul. Our guide, another Hilda, was very dramatic and extremely adept at scaring the shit out of me. The most fascinating part of the site was being able to see human bone, clothes, hair on the paths leading to the tombs, ie that hadn't been excavated but had been revealed by the wind blowing the sand away displaying the macabre findings in plain view. We even found a mis-shapen wisdom tooth of one unfortunate.

The museum had the best preserved specimen with ribs and other bones well preserved and flesh stuck to bandages. The poor bloke looked just like Bob Marley. Also included on the trip was a visit to a ceramic and gold factory with a demonstration on how to make the former and mine and extract the latter.

We got back to the hotel at 6 and dinner at 7. Another chicken dish, the best Pisco Sour so far and ice cream for pud. Red 3 sentences of my new Dean Koontz and that sent me off into a deep sleep.

19th November

A day off today. We are due to catch the night bus to Nazca at 9pm this evening but before then I have a chore list as long as your arm to complete. The first and most important being the acquisition of new shoes. Bata is the name of the shoe shop, not sure if it is just in Peru or in other parts of the world. I spent 15 quid on a mock pair of hiking boots which will hopefully hold together until I reach New York. Arequipa is a very friendly city with great architecture made from the local volcanic rock (sillar). Took lots of photos of churches and the impressive plaza de armas and bought many souvenirs.

Tried to find the sister restaurant of last night "Zig-Zag creperie" but failed. I also passed on meeting the others who were going to the monastery at 12pm instead favouring the pool and the hotel bar. Also on the list was have haircut but I was saved from a fate worse than death when a powercut prevented me from entering one peluqueria with photos of models sporting "Limahl haircuts".

Finally had food (veg lasagne and salad) around 5pm and met a girl from the Dragoman tour called Jenny. She was nice if a little exciteable but her lesbian tour guide looked and sounded like a complete battle-axe. We sat around reception for several hours until my washing came back from the lavanderia (8pm) when the bus came to take us to the coach terminal.

There are many liars in this world - Bil Clinton, Richard Nixon and the bloke who coined the phrase "luxury coach". Despite the fact that our bus was black with go faster stripes and flames on the side the inside looked depressingly like the trains that used to take me to Chelmsford 3 times a week. We piled on up to the top deck. Ted and Jean had 2 seats, Peter and Jane had another 2. I was sitting by myself for 15 mins. "Will I have a double to myself like the trip to Puno?". In a word, no, because Miguel "the Fridge" Sanchez, for want of a better name, came and plonked himself heavily next to me. This guy weighed about 18 stone and had more dampness under his arms than the contents of Lake Titicaca.

Our "in-drive" meal consisted of chicken and rice that ironically was served in an aluminium tray similar to a chinese takeaway, a pastry which I left untouched and a desert everyone left untouched. The meal was washed down with complimentary Inca Kola. which is the colour of radioactive wee and has the taste of bubblegum and ice cream soda. "Miguel" ate so quickly it was almost as though his mouth was so close to the tray he could have hoovered up the grains of rice. The film was "Deja Vu" again with Denzel Washington and was stopped 3/4 of the way through. I guess that meant bed-time.

Miguel who despite his size had kept his limbs over his side during the meal decided now was the time to stretch out. He was snoring within 5 minutes and his lardy arms spilled over to my half of the seat as his chest rose and fell. At one point he put his head on my shoulder and got a quick but accurate kick in the shins. This had a strange effect. He shot up in his seat, I thought he was going to belt me, but he took off his sweatshirt, removed his wrist watch, scrathed his crotch and faced the other way. It wasn't long before he gravitated towards me again. I though as we had another 8 hours to go I should either say something or put up and shut up. As a compromise I wedged my North Face coat between our heads and shoulders and then managed an awkward sleep until dawn.

From the station we got a minibus to the hotel. No idea what kind of place it was as I was asleep on my feet. All I can tell you is that the Nazca airport is opposite our hotel. Have gone to bed immediately. We meet again in 2 hours. Night-night.

Monday, November 19, 2007

18th November

FIVE AM START! We have been informed that to see the condors we have to get there early. The journey took about an hour and a half. Colca Canyon differs from Colca Valley like pretty much every canyon/valley. The former is a deep crack in the rock with a river at the bottom, the latter is farmed and can contain villages/towns etc. I haven't been to the Grand Canyon but all I can tell you is that Colca Canyon is twice as deep. I get the feeling the Grand Canyon is more spectacular but when you look at the bottom of Colca Canyon the river looks like a silver thread.

Hilda spotted a condor within 5 mins of our arrival. She said it was a condor but by the time I had unzipped my camera and turned it on it coud have been a crow it was so far away. Bugger.

We headed to Cruz del Condor ("Condor Cross") for a better viewing point. With the tourists it may as well have been called Cruz del Gringo. We waited, and waited. Not helped by the fact that most visits don't end up seeing anything. Partly due to the noise of the tourists. I didn ask one Peruvian woman if she would mind shutting it. Got the feeling like the Sun Gate last week that we wouldn't see anything, and then suddenly I spotted what I thought was a small plane and just for added effect I shouted "Showtime!" and then immediately cringed. The condor is big, very big. It has a wingspan of 3-4 meters and one of the few birds that does flap its wings, it just glides. My photos were pretty good - better than most of the postcards I have seen. I am not a bird-spotter but even I have to say these things were magnificent. Took snap after snap.

The journey back to Arequipa was largely uneventful. Apart from hitting and killing a dog. Our driver wsa a nutter and was over the speed limit most of the time. The dog didn't have a chance. When we stopped for lunch the whole of the front of the grille was smashed in and bits of fur stuck to the number plate.

3 hours later we were back in Arequipa. Said goodbye to Hilda and gave her my contact details. She wants to go for tea at the Ritz if she makes it to London. We have a free day tomorrow to visit the city but on first inspection it is really green and clean. My new hotel room was horrible. Nothing seemed to work and the windows have no locks. We went for a stroll (aka an Orientation Walk) with Paul who joined us after the tour. Indeed Arequipa is nice, good restaurants, bars, churches and the Plaza de Armas is very impressive. We booked a table for 7.30pm at ZIg Zag reputed to be the best restaurant in Perú let alone Arequipa.

A quick shower and a stroll to the restaurant. Rocky and Tony joined us, this is now the last supper with them as they are off to Lima tomorrow night. The restaurant was indeed great. We had a private room and I had 2 beers, wine, water, tomato soup, bread with herb butter, Ostrich with anchovy butter, Alpaca with guacamole and fillet steak with a tomato salsa and chips and ratatouille for... nine pounds 50. OK, the steak wasn't up t Argentinian standards but was pretty damn good.

17th November

We had an 8.30am start which felt like a lie-in. Breakfast was outside and the sun was already baking. Paul told us last night that Arequipa gets about 360 days of sunshine a year. Result! He won't be joining us on the excursion for the next few days and will be catching up with his family.

Today we are off to the Colca Valley to see more wildlife (most notably the condors of Colca Canyon). The journey takes about 5 hours but has lots of photo stops and tea breaks. Our new guide is called Hilda. Don't be put off by the name - she is a Peruvian fox. We also have a few new people on the trip. A group of 3 Germans frm Munich. The grandmother of whom is like a Bavarian Margaret Rutherford. Our first stop was to buy water, we will be topping 4500m on the trip and you don't want to be dehydrated for that. We passed huge volcanoes on the roads out of Arequipa and the landscape became more barren as we climbed higher.

We soon passed through the Reserva National Salinas y Aguada Blanca nature reserve. Huge packs of Alpaca and Llama were soon spooted right and left and then we saw the less common Vicuña (Perú's national animal) - these are smaller, thinner beasts than their other camelid brothers and their wool is so fine and expensive that a Vicuña pashmina would fetch US$1500. Our first drink and toilet stop was in a place with no name - just a lot of poeple selling local crafts. I had another mint tea (muña).

We cracked on to our final destination where we will be staying the night, Coporaque. The hotel has an amazing view of the Colca valley with farms and terraces etched into the hills and 2 snow-capped volcanoes in the distance. There is also a semi-tame alpaca called Spot roaming the grounds who seemed to eat anything and everything in its path. The room is nice and after a bit of impromptu DIY to fix the rattling window it was perfect.

Lunch was a buffet but my God was it good. Salads, cold meats, cheese, soups and BBQd alpaca and chicken. "Eat as much as you can", and I did. We also met another couple on the tour - a retired surgeon and a surgical registrar from Bristol. They were over here to perform ENT operations on the locals of Cusco, Arequipa and Lima.

The afternoon activities were two-fold. Firstly, a walk around "the block" and then a trip to the thermal pools of Chivay, the capital of the Colca Valley. I declined the first, partly due to my over inflated belly from lunch. They took about 45 mins to walk, I think it was scheduled for one hour but I think Margaret Rutherford might have led the party. I waited for them in reception which was dull apart from when Spot decided outside lacked a certain warmth and then marched into the lobby with a groundsman in hot pursuit.

The spa was good (38 degrees C), despite looking like Gringo Soup from a distance. Stank of sulphur but wasn't as good as Baños last month. The pools are separated into Gringos and Latinos - this is partly due to the fact that the locals go there to exfoliate, shave and scrub all body parts which the Gringos find repulsive - according to Hilda. There were a couple of musicians to pass the hour quicker and a fully-licenced bar. Had a further chat with Hilda on the way back to the bus. Her spanish has to be the clearest I have heard in South America so far.

Dinner was another buffet and even better than lunch. It is like Club Med revisited. I had to undo my belt part way through the steak course - I don't know these Peruvian laundrettes must be shrinking my clothes or something.

16th November

Depsite last night's indulgences I actually felt pretty good in the morning - I wonder if altitude metabolises alcohol more quickly? Went back to the bad service restaurant for breakfast and had pancakes with maple syrup and cappuccino. SPent a while in an internet cafe and went back to the hotel. Was gutted when I got there as I had missed Bridgeen and Willie by minutes. Their plane was due to leave an hour earlier than they thought. I also missed Elaine and Lindsay but they are due to travel to Arequipa today as well so hopefully I will get to see them. Our bus was due to leave at 3pm and take 5 hours. We stocked up on healthy snacks at the bus station - ie Pringles, chocolate and Coke.

Our bus was pretty comfortable with lots of leg room. The first film was utter rubbish. An Argentinian comedy which was a bit like a feature length Benny Hill. After "90 minutes of sheer hell" our waitress (yes, waitress) Andréa, started a game of Bingo (!) over the intercom. Very surreal but good for practising numbers in Spanish. The second film was Man on FIre with Denzel Washington which was actually a better film than I remmber. We even got a food package - 2 mini sponges, a boiled sweet and an orange drink brightr than the sun. The journey to Arequipa was a little stressful as the curtains in the cab were closed so you couldn't see the oncoming traffic.

We arrived in Arequipa at 8pm and went straight to the hotel. It looks a nice one! It has a pool, hammocks and a cafe outside.My room is small but very comfortable and the TV has lots of channels! Dinner was good (veg lasagne) but I was so hungry I would have eaten leaves. We were only 4 at dinner. Paul went to see his Mrs as he lives with his mum and pregnant wife about 5 blocks away. Ted also went to bed early as he was suffering from "stress" from the journey.

Friday, November 16, 2007

15th November

Fought the urge to pee in the outside toilet during the night as it was freezing cold (slept in my sleeping bag under the covers). Breakfast was pancakes and tea. Basic but tasty. We met the others at the port. Said farewell to Juana and shook her leathery hand goodbye. The journey to the Taquile islands was rough. Just before we docked Jean (Canadian) rushed to the toilet to be sick. Never seen her move so fast. Ted was his unemotional self and let her get on with it. There was a big hike to the highest point on the island but the town had little to offer. In fact, the general consensus was this morning was definitely the low point of the tour so far.

We agreed to skip lunch to get back to Puno as soon as possible. We arrived around 3. After a much needed shower we went to lunch to a place near the hotel called "Great Restaurant" which as you might have guessed failed to live up to its name.The service was rubbish and the food was cold but to be honest we were so hungry we would have eaten anything.

We met Rocky and Tony at out hotel at 7 and then the rip started in earnest. After many a Pisco Sour, Cuba Libre and cerveza we were all steaming. Brigeen and Willie were in good form and the Craic was had by all. It was a great night - one of the best I have had so far on my travels and Dan, if you are reading this I have to say you would have failed to beat me at the sir-guitarring again as the state of jeans now proves.

It wasn't that late a night by Buenos Aires standards (1.30am) but as the photos show I doubt we would have lasted much longer. Having said that some hardy folk went clubbing but I had had enough by then.

Luckily we have a lie-in tomorrow and don't leave Puno until 3pm.

14th November

I thought I had experienced most of the transport in South America but getting push bikes with 2 seats bolted to the front was certainly a laugh. We went in 4 of these things to the port to catch our boat which will take us on a tour of Lake Titicaca. Had to make a pit-stop first to pick up presents for our host families as we will be staying on the Amantani island tonight. We had a budget of 10 soles but most of us went over that. I bought 2 toothbrushes, toothpaste, soap, pasta and sardines (ok, the choice was limited).

We met our guide near the boat. His name was Edwin, he had a squeaky voice and smelled of sweat. The boat was like a coach inside and seated about 30.

The first stop was to the floating islands of the Uros Indians. They speak Spanish and their native language of Aymara. The islands take about a year to make out of reeds and as the name suggests they float. Walking on the reeds was like walking on a pavement after 6 pints - difficult. The island we visited was about as big as an olympic swimming pool but circular. It had about 3 houses, a trout pool, a communal oven and a post office! We had a talk on how the islands are made, what the locals eat and drink and how families are made when there is no local disco or datingdirect.com. We took a boat ride to visit the other communities in the region, bought a few odds and sods and then we set off for the Amantani island.

The journey took about 3 and a half hours with the sea fairly calm. I slept for most of it. We were greeted at the port by our "mothers" who were far more interested in their knitting rather than their new house-guests. I will be staying with a lady called Juana who is small, dark and judging by her toothless grin my 10 soles would have been better spent on chocolate not dental products.

Lake Titicaca is high up. Really high up at around 3800m. We must have trekked another 100m vertically to get to the house. The house was typical - very low celings, a small smoky kitchen, an outside toilet complete with bucket to "flush" and a plethora of animals inside and outside including a donkey, lots of sheep,a cat and a litter of guinea pigs living in a compartment under the stove. My room had three beds and about 300 files but the beds were comfy and clean. We had lunch which was Quinoa soup (vegetable) and some very squeaky cheese and root vegetables. Also tried the local mint tea which was really refreshing.

The itinerary of events is quite hectic on this part of the tour and within 20 mins of the plates being cleared away we were marched off to the football field. Coaching football at altitude was hard, playing 6 a side was like torture. After a slow start my team found some form and we won 4-2. WIlliams getting a hat-trick including a volley from 15 yds. I would have got 4 but a Kiwi girlput her thigh in the way of my pile-driver. I was also glad my walking boots (destroyed after the Inca Trail) managed this latest onslaught. I can't wait to get to Arequipa to buy new ones. The Canadian couple didn't take part but it meant Ted was chief photographer. I think he has oneof my strikes on goalcaught on film.

After the game we walked to the top of Pachamama ("Mother Earth") mountain the second highest peak on the island. The views were great as was the sunset. Willie and I had a beer at the top (5 soles) and we bumped into the Aussies Tony and Rocky from the Inca Trail and made arrangements to go on the rip tomorrow night in Puno.

When we got back to the house we ate pretty much straight away.We ate more soup and then rice,veg, roast spuds and chicken.We also met the father (Eduardo) and the 2 sons (William and Fernando). No rest after dinner either as we were taken by torch light to the local town hall. We had to dress in ponchos and woolly hats and then danced with our "mothers" who again looked much happier with their knitting than having to dance with a bunch of Gringos. The Canadians didn't take part again. I really don't know why they are on this tour. It was an early night and was in bed by 10 and fell asleep to the soundof the donkey braying and the waves hitting the shore line.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

13th November

We are off to the town of Puno today which lies on the banks of lake Titicaca. It is a bus ride of 6 and a half hours away so I made sure I had supplies for the trip (Twix, Snickers, Doritos and water). We met at 7.30 am and got a bus to the terminal terrestre. Journey was pretty dull. The landscape was pretty sparse as we climbed to 4300m for a pit stop. I slept most of the 6 hours which bodes well for our overnight trip from Arequipa to Nazca next week. The penultimate town we passed through was called Juliaca and was a long street of car garages and rough looking fast food stalls. I saw 2 dead dogs with bloated bodies and covered in maggots. Nice.

Puno has a population of about 130,000 and has very little for the tourist apart from the port for trips to the floating islands on Lake Titicaca which is where we are off tomorrow.

Our hotel is great. I have a double bed as does my rucksack. There is also a bath and a big TV. We went for lunch/dinner at a very cosy cafe with a set menu of 15 soles (2 pounds 50). I had a Pisco Sour, soup, pasta, cake and tea.

We have another early start tomorrow so I am off to bed shortly.

12th November

It's a free day today. A chance to rest the aching calves and do some shopping. I have a second parcel to send back to Inglaterra. Mostly papers, presents, my rucksack liner and other odds and sods. Started the day at Jack's cafe with Jane and Peter. The Canadians were already there. Ted still has his hat permanently glued to his head. I went for el desayuno gordo which literally translates as "fat breakfast". A huge pile of steaming cholesterol including sausage which you don't really see in South America.

Bought sellotape, presents for the aunt and sister, still tried to find pulsera for me and also bought a t-shirt. Packed all the above with several strips of duct tape and managed to blag a cardboard box from an old fella in a shop. Getting something for free never seems to happen over here but today was my lucky day.

Found the post office on Avenida El Sol. Very efficient service and at a mere 127 soles the parcel is now bound for Solihull. My Quito parcel has already arrived 10 days early which is a bonus.

Went back to Jack's for a cappuccino and a minted lemonade and returned to hotel to get socks to try on shoes (my walking boots are now held together by sweat following the Inca Trail). Didn't find any shoes or boots I liked (wasn't going to spend 40 quid on a pair of Hi-tec trainers!).

We went out for dinner at a restaurant called 2 Nations which is owned by an Aussie so he menu is either burgers or Peruvian food. Most of the gang went for fillet steak. I stuck to soup, still full after el gordo. Also tried my first Pisco Sour. Nearly a pint in a Bordeaux glass. It tastes like a less hash Tequila and is made from Pisco Brandy, lime juice and has a layer of whisked egg white on top with a dusing of cinnamon. Very tasty and only 5 soles (about 80p). I think I'll be having more over the next 10 days.

Something weird happened when the bill arrived, there was confusion over whether our tour guide had to pay the restaurant (normally they get the meal for free but this was a new restaurant) and the owner began to relate a sob story about how he didn't like the Peruvian way of doing business (remember Paul our guide is from Arequipa) and he could have the meal free next time. All very strange. Jane (a bottle of wine to the good) went to give him a piece of her mind while some of us made our excuses and left.

Bryce and Bernadette's last night so I said farewell to them both and went off to bed. A few of the other went back to Paddy O'Flaherty's and stumbled in at 1.30am having rung the bell continuously - but I didn't care, tonight is my first night in a room by myself and as Bryce has gone I should have my own room for the rest of the Peru trip which means no more ear-plugs and arse cracks.

Monday, November 12, 2007

11th November - Inca Trail Day 4

4am wasn't as painful as it sounded and darkness has its benefits as it was impossible to wake up to the sight of "Bryce Canyon" for the second day running. The porters have to rush the breakfast and the packing of the equipment as they have to run down the mountain to make the first train to Ollantaytambo at 5.30am and start another trail - amazing.

We walked the remaining 4km to the sun gate to take a magnificent photo of........ cloud. We waited for it to clear. It got worse. We waited some more and then suddenly the sun broke through and burned off all the white to reveal the city of Machu Picchu in the distance. A truly memorable sight. But this isn't the famous picture postcard view, that is much nearer so we trekked off for the remaining 45 mins. When we got there we were greeted by a herd of llama blocking our path but they seemed more interested in the grass.

The view our final meeting point was exactly the same as in all the magazines and TV programmes I have watched and we all looked on in silence. I took scores of photos and even tried to text home the image but it didn't work. We had a tour in the city for 2 hours which was great but we were all fazed after 3 and a half days of trekking and with the sun beating down it was a real struggle to keep awake. The architecture was amazing and the positioning of the major buildings with the points of the compass and the surrounding mountains defies belief.

We went on the bus to Aguas Calientes and into the first bar for a celebratory beer and/or Pisco Sour and pizza and a chance to reminisce and chill out. We gave the hot springs a miss after mixed reports on the cleanliness. By now I am in desperate need of a shower and a launderette.

Our train back to Cusco left at 5pm sharp but as is typical in South America the arrival time is unknown so we only went 3/4 of the way and got a minibus back to Cusco from a town called Poroy.

At the hotel the shower and shave was soooooo good. Even Bryce shaved off his goatee! We all met in reception for our "night on the rip". We have 3 more Irish join us today. Lindsay and Elaine, they will be with us for the trip to Lake Titicaca next. We went to Paddy O'Flaherty's pub.Very Gringo but as there are now 5 Paddies in the group it seemed fitting. We were all wrecked. Brigeene is still under the weather with her stomach but was sending home many a beer. There were also a few drop outs from the Antipodeans. Still I had a good albeit short night out. In bed by 1am.

10th November - Inca Trail Day 3

One thing about camping despite the discomfort is that the tents always look bigger on the outside.but in reality they are like a Tardis in reverse. I woke up to the sight of Bryce's hairy arse crack about 12 inches from my face.

Must have blown nose for most of the night, not sure my tent-mate was impressed. But the good news is I survived the night. Not sure the temperature dropped that much. Got the wake up call from the porters at 5 am and had choice of hot choc, coca tea or coffee in the tent. The facilities are much more conventional at this campsite and I didn't have to "convert".

We have 2 more passes today but they should be less steep. The first one is called Pacasmayo due to the name of the ruins at the top. All very picturesque. We also went through tunnels and saw humming birds and butterflies as the second pass, Phuyupatamarca, took us through the jungle.

At the end of the day's trek we caught a glimpse the town Aguas Calientes which means Machu Picchu is just around the corner. Our final campsite is a real Gringo treasure - you can pay 6 soles for a hot shower (I didn't) or 6 soles for a beer (I did, repeatedly). The cold is getting better and I am only blowing every hour now. I final meal was beef goulash with mash, rice and fried pots. Afterwards we dished out the monies to the porters and cooks and I was asked to do an impromptu speech which was a bit rubbish as I hadn't prepared anything. After the meal there was lots of squabbling amongst the porters and calculators being typed furiously. Tomorrow is an even more unsociable start at 4am so we can go and beat the crowds and see Machu Picchu from the sun gate.

9th November - Inca Trail Day 2

"I fantasize about massive pristine convenience. Brilliant gold taps, virginal white marble, a seat carved from ebony, a cistern full of Chanel No. 5, and a flunky handing me pieces of raw silk toilet roll. But under the circumstances I'll settle for anywhere."
Mark Renton, Trainspotting.

The cramps in my stomach told me it was time. I had no idea of the hour but it was still dark. Headed for the stench in the distance with paper in one hand and Maglite® in the other. Trap #3 had now moved up in the pecking order of cleanliness with only a moderate covering of wet faeces over the floor. The cubicle had no lock. I carefully positioned the torch to illuminate the hole in the floor. Never having been to such a campsite toilet I had asked around for the best strategy to achieve the task. Most people said you squat with your right hand on the back wall to give stability. If you'd seen the state of the back wall you too would have passed on this. I opted for the trousers round ankles, arms in front to balance. Was paranoid the torch would slip and go down the hole so kept glancing up to make sure it was secure. Still had stage fright and couldn't until it dawned on me that my current approach was exactly the same procedure Jonny Wilkinson adopts when he attempts to kick a penalty. That was the "light relief" I needed and the rest is history.

In other news the cold is in full flow. Still when I finish the trail I will take extra satisfaction that I did it under par. Today we have to navigate Warmiwanusca or to give it its more famous name "Dead Woman's pass" - attributed to an American who died while showing off and running at 4000m and then going into cardiac failure.

We started at 3500m and ended up at 4200 at the top. The going was pretty tough - it was more the blazing sun rather than the altitude. Great scenery though. We all made it in various times, I must have blown my nose a hundred times. Bryce had a beer to celebrate. The Aussies had 75% rum. I stuck to Gatorade and chocolate. The trip down the other side of the pass was interesting - sheer steps all the way to our next campsite. Very tough on the knees.

We had lunch when we arrived at 4pm at Papamaya. Bacon and traditional Peruvian fare. I have also lost my voice and have the sweats. Got a bit concerned that with the temperatures predicted to drop to zero tonight it might be s struggle to get sleep. I am also out of painkillers. 3 of the group are ill with stomach problems and skipped dinner. Went to bed after dinner with 4 layers on top, long johns, a liner for the sleeping back and fleece and anorak next to me. Fingers crossed.

8th November - Inca Trail Day 1

In a word "chaos". They are going to strike after all and it meant we had to get up at 3.30 AM instead. All very rushed. We met 6 new folk on the bus bound for the trail - Charlie and Steve (New Zealand), Marcel and Ils (Holland) and Rocky and Tony (Australia). No one was in a mood to socialise. Far too early. We had breakfast in a different part of Ollantaytambo (Piscacucho) at the start of the 82km marker of the trail. Eggs, toast, jam, coffee, juice - got a feeling I will need every calorie. We went to the trail check point, got passports stamped and set of. Fairly easy walking but this is expected for today. Good to be in the fresh air but I think I am getting a cold. We had a couple of breaks to dehydrate and rehydrate en route to completing our 11km for today. We also visited the remains at Llactapata which was a good opportunity to take photos and take the weight off your legs. Lunch was soup followed by chicken and veg. I went to cut the chicken leg but out spilt clotted blood. Not a great start. A few struggled on the trail. The Canadians were always last to arrive, Jean blamed it on low blood sugar like most overweight people do.

The stories about the porters on the trail were totally justified. They are all about 5' 4" but carry about 30-40 kgs on their back uphill, downhill and running most of the time to set up camp before we arrive. One bloke even carried a stove on his back complete with gas cylinder. They all hurry along the way and only stop for chicha (a weak Cusqueñan beer which looks like fruit juice).

We got to our final destination of Huallaybamba. All the tents were nicely laid out and were bigger than expected. Had a siesta before hot chocolate, popcorn and crackers at 5.30pm.
The campsite toilets - dear God. Nothing could have prepared you for what was in Trap #1. I fear I passed but I have to return later with a torch. Dinner was soup and trout with vegetables. We went to bed straight after. Apparently tomorrow is going to be tough.

7th November

Breakfast was comedy. 7 soles in the hotel equates to very dry toast, juice and coffee that never changes colour irrespective of the amount of milk added.I joinedBernadette who had bought Irish tea bags with her. The others went back to Jack's cafe. My duffelbag nowweighs less than the rucksack I will be carrying for the next 5 days. Most of the contents consists of high cholesterol snacks and medicine.

Today we are off to the sacred valley of the Incas. This isn't part of the trek but sets the scene for the history of the region. First stop was Saqsaywaman (yes, pronounced "sexy woman"), ancient ruins overlooking Cusco. Ruben is very knowledgeable on the subject and the architecture of the Incas is fascinating like that of the Egyptians. They even built at 80 degree angles (rather than 90) to counteract the earthquakes of Peru. We took lots of photos of the ancient ruins, went through tunnels and slide down rock slides.

A short trip up the road took us to a llama and alpaca farm. The alpacas are v friendly and I suppose if I had to I would say they were cute their fur being like cotton wool. Pity I tried them with chips last night. Llamas are big horrible creatures that spit at you at any opportunity. Just before lunch we went on a short trek to the ancient citadel of Pisac. Most of the walk was uphill which is good practice for the Inca Trail. A few sheer drops off the path certainly focussed the mind. We had lunch in the new town of Pisac. Not great. My food was cold.We went around the market for an hour or so - still couldn't find a peruvian equivalentof my pulsera. Helped Brigeene to haggle to get a cheap price for a painting. The "she has a sick brother" seemsto work quite well.

The bus ride from Pisac was interesting. It turns out that Bernadette certainly doesn't have the luck of the Irish - she left her duffel bag in Cusco and her camera in Pisac. We drove back but sadly no hope of finding it. Our final stop for the day was Ollantaytambo. A real astronomical gem of a place with everything aligned in the village to the major constellations and gates carved into mountains thatonly let light through on the summer and winter solstices. Pretty impressive. Ruben did a great job of explaining the history and we had a brief chat in Spanish about the class of women in Buenos Aires.

Tonight we are staying in a "guest house". 2 showers, 16 people, pretty basic. Willy and I playedagame of "Sapo" which is the peruvian equivalent of darts.You have to throw big brass coins onto a board with holes in it. The coins crop through the holes (hopefully) and each hole is associated with a number. The highest score wins. There is also a big brass toad (un sapo in Spanish) in the middle that if you manage to throw a coin into its mouth you get maximum points.

We got last minute provisions for the trail tomorrow (chocolate mainly). The Canadians said nothing through dinner. Ted didn't even take his hat off. We all discussedtipping for theporters and cook for the trail. I wonder if they'll ask me to do a speech again? We all had an early night, we have to get up at 4 AM to get to the start of the trail. This is 3 hours earlier than normal because it is rumoured that the Peruvian unions are striking tomorrow and blockades are predicted. Personally I can't see them get their lazy arses out of bed.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

6th November

Nothing on this morning apart from return to airport. Took photos of the parrots at the lodge and we were away promptly at 7. The tranquility of journey back upstream was broken by the sound of an animal not endemic to the region - the American abroad. We were lucky enough to travel with 7 American spiritualists who were training to be shamen. One was heard to say "Gee, we should give so much thanks for all the colors (sic) of these heavenly trees".

Caught flight back to Cusco and bussed it to the hotel. From a distance Cusco looks like a small Quito. And that is where the similarity ends. We were at M above sea level so breathing is again strained. But I know all the tricks now. The centre is made up of 3 plazas, has good restaurants, bars, shops, quite cheap and the people are really friendly. Hotel was great too. We tried coca tea on arrival (this is the local brew supposed to give energy and fight altitude-sickness. Oh yeah, you make cocaine from it too). Went for an "orientation walk" with Paul who did the history bit. Went to buy duct tape to repair my walking boots. They have nearly fallen apart in 2 months but it is too close to the Inca Trail to buy and break in new ones. Spoke a fair bit of Spanish to the shopkeepers which was good and I can now tell you that "Cinta plomba" is duct-tape and bloody expensive at 25 soles. There are also a lot of women touting Andean massages in the town. I do hope they are pucker as after a 4 day trek they will be most welcomed. There are also a lot of people trying to flog pictures, ornaments, leather work etc which was a bit of a drag after a while.

We had lunch in Jack's cafe which should be called Gringo's cafe but the food was good and there was lots of it and a nice change from jungle food. Had ham and cheese toastie and ginger, lime and honey tea for about a fiver.

At 6.30 we met our guide for the Inca Trail, Ruben. He gave us the duffel bags we are allowed to fill with 5 kgs of our stuff. These will be carried by the porters on the trek. My sleeping bag, liner and energy snacks came to 2kg! It sounds like day 2 of 4 will be the longest. We have 3 passes to cross. The one on day 2 is called "Dead woman's pass" and we reach 4200M which will mean breathing will be even harder.

Dinner was in a very posh eclectic restaurant serving traditional Peruvian fare. Our new joiner to the tour, Bernadette from Dublin, had Roast Guinea Pig (Cuy) and seems well up for the Craic. Jane had Llama and I had Alpaca and chips. Mine was pretty dry but it is amazing what can be achieved with a bit of vinagre balsámico.

Went back to hotel, watched Seinfeld in Spanish. Rechecked 5 kgs and went to bed.

5th November - Jungle Tour Day 2

Another early one - fruit, bread and popcorn for breakfast and then a 1/2 day trek into the rainforest. It was a great experience - we saw owls, parrots, hawks, frogs and toads, indigenous fruits that smelled of oranges and some that were "jungle garlic",trees bigger than houses, vines like pythons and trunks of trees teeming with fire-ants and the forest floor being covered with leaf-cutter ants. We also took a trip down a tributary in a dugout canoe and saw toucan, black caiman (much bigger than the previous night), butterflies and a heron. And then the heavens opened. Dear God, it isn't called a rainforest for nothing. We eventually headed back to the lodge. It was 4km and the trip was very wet but the poncho held up. The highlight of the morning was when Victor our guide coaxed a tarantula out from it's lair with a piece of bamboo. This beast was about as big as a cat. OK, it was as big as your hand but still got the hairs on the back of your neck to stand up. I also spotted what I thought was an oddly-shaped stone and went to turn it over with my foot but nearly died when Victor informed the rest of the group that I had just kicked a baby turtle in the head. It was fine though, just superficial bruising I guess.

We went back for lunch - still tipping down and actually it went really cold. Shivered way through lunch and made the call to miss the fishing expedition in the afternoon to sleep off the chills. The group singularly failed to catch anything but apparently the highlight was when Jean nearly fired her bait into a wasp's nest.

Back to normal after a kip and was back on the ale pre- and post-dinner. We are all getting to know each other better. Brigeene & Willy are a right laugh, it's a shame they aren't doing the full 3 weeks. Jane and Peter are nice. The Canadians are seriously boring. Both TT but not only do they not drink, they insist on SHARING cokes at dinner instead of having one each.

Lights out (literally, the power goes off at 10) and then bed. Have first mosquito bite on my leg - seeing as they have been covered all day it means the little sod bit me through my trousers!

4th November - Jungle Tour Day 1

We had breakfast in the hotel. 6 Nuevos Soles (about a quid) gets you bread, jam, coffee and juice. Met the tour guide, Paul. He is Peruvian but speaks excellent English. Took a flight from Lima to Cusco - Puerto Maldonado (the main port for entry to the jungle). The flight had some tasty turbulence. I was trying to remember what caused turbulence - is it when cold air (Andes) meets hot air (jungle)? Our stop in Cusco gave us a taster of what to expect on the Inca Trail. But that is next week!

Getting of the plane at Puerto Maldonado was like stepping into Bangkok - hot, humid and looked like it would pour at any moment. We took a bus to the jetty for our motorised canoe that would take us to the lodge. We stopped off to but waterproof ponchos and water for the next 3 days.

The canoe took about 90 mins to get to the lodge. The river was brown just like all the geography books and documentaries and you felt if you dangled your hand over the side you'd probably lose it to a piranha. The trip was fairly dull apart from when we had to navigate through a sea of trees that had been uprooted by the day before's rain.

We arrived at the lodge which comprises about 20 different cabins with running water (cold) and twin beds. The windows have mosquito-proof netting. Our cabin (called Sachavaca, which means river cow, ie a tapir) is about 50M from the river bank and has a restaurant, bar, pool and acres of trees, flowers and some very strange-looking birds and animals.

We had lunch straight away and it was a good opportunity to meet the other travellers. There are 8 of us. Me, Bryce Major, a couple from England (Peter and Jane - nice), a couple from Canada (Ted and Jean - boring) and 2 newly-weds from Galway (Brigeene and Willy - great fun). Lunch was chicken, rice, grapes and olives served in a banana leaf. Dry but better than the airplane food.

At 4 we went on a short boat ride across the river to "La isla de monos" ("Monkey Island") with a huge bag of bananas. In less than 5 mins we were surrounded by black spider monkeys, brown and white chested Capuccine monkeys. They were so clever these buggers could even catch and peel the bananas we threw to them. One peed on Jean's head and one climbed up on to my shoulders. I'd like to think they we tree-like but I think I might be kidding myself. We even saw a mother and her baby which was quite uncommon and was made even more special by the dad looking on trying to peel a mandarin with limited success.

Dinner was at 7 but had time for a few cold ones and a game of pool with Bryce Major. Dinner was soup, stir-fried beef (I hope) and rice with fruit to follow. At 8pm we went caiman-spotting. Slightly surreal but amazing start to the trip - we left the river bank and then cut the motor and floated down the river in total darkness listening to the sounds of the jungle. Cicadas, birds, frogs were all calling into the night. We only saw 2 tiny caiman before returning to the lodge. My photos are rubbish. Early night for me - it was really muggy so went to bed in pants and an entire covering of DEET.

3rd November

Headed off to Lima. I had forgotten I'd been here before (Buenos Aires - Quito) and so took the wrong turning and ended up in Transfers instead of Immigration. Arrived at 8.30pm. The taxi from the airport cost $20 which seemed a bit steep but I suppose it was justified as it was being driven by Michael Schumacher. The new hotel (Kamana) is ok, half the room was full of stuff but the owner must be out with the rest of the tour.

Packed luggage for the trip to the jungle. This is the first destination of the Tucan "Peru Completed" tour. I have short-sleeves, long sleeves and a truck load of mossie spray.

The room mate returned. He is called Bryce Major from Auckland. We spoke briefly while he packed his stuff and I half-watched Passenger 57 in Spanish.

Saturday, November 3, 2007

2nd November - Galápagos Day 4

What a rubbish night's sleep. My mobile and so clock is out of battery as it has been trying to connect via 3G in my rucksack so our cabin was without time throughout. I gout up and checked the clock in the lounge at 2, 3.15, 4.05 and finally 4.55. Showered and went up on deck. Saw Priscila sitting on a sun lounger so I took the opportunity to speak a last offering of Spanish and find out a bit more about our guide and watch the sun rise. I even remembered the verb "amanacer" (to rise, as in sun).

It is really hot this morning as we are now back in the north. Our dinghy ride was great. We powered our way to the cove and the killed the motor and used the paddle to float around the mangroves. We saw tens of white-tipped shark, turtles and 2 different types of ray and the full complement of birds. The only noise to break the solitude was Eliot and wife having an argument about who saw the first ray. Zzzzz.

Our last breakfast was a bit rushed and then we headed back to Baltra for the airport. We waited 3 hours there which was a bit annoying as we could have gone to another island. I didn't succumb to the $5 per hour internet charge like most of our party. Said goodbye to Priscila and Ema (English girl from our boat who was staying on for another few days). The flight was instantly forgettable despite the groans of agony from Eliot and his tooth.

We eventually got back to my favourite place, Quito, on a direct flight. When we got back to La Mariscal it was dead, I forgot it is bank holiday this weekend.

Had dinner in the hotel - my new favourite place in Quito. Had a steak and veg and chocolate ice cream and beer. Still only came to 9 quid in total.

Tomorrow I have some chores to do and desperately need to copy my photos to disk and also my boots for Machu Picchu aren't in great shape. I have a few holes forming so I will need to look up the Spanish for "Waterproof, flexible adhesive".

Tomorrow evening I leave for Lima. 5 Weeks in Ecuador has finally come to an end. It has been average for the first 4 weeks and amazing for the last week. This time in 2 days I will be in the jungle. I have already taken my first Malarone (anti-malarial) tablet and I seem to still be alive. In 5 days time I will be walking the trail to Machu Picchu. Again I won't be updating the blog until I get to Cusco in about 10 days from now.

1st November - Galápagos Day 3

I spent the first 30 mins of the day applying after sun. It is easy to forget you are still on the equator and the sun is fierce. Breakfast was even better than yesterday with real pancakes. Over night we sailed to the west to a small island called Bartolomé. A huge rock stands way from the cliffs (apparently it was formed by the yanks testing explosive in WW2). The rocks are covered in bird droppings so it looks white from the dinghies. We also saw the tiny Galápagos penguin who put a show on for us. Other sites included a Galápagos heron sitting on its nest and the obligatory red crab we have seen everywhere.

Bartolomé is very volcanic and comprised entirely of ash making the landscape very barren and difficult to sustain flora and fauna. We only saw lava lizards. We did trek up a hill to view the extent of the volcanic eruptions over the years. Great photos. We also had the obligatory group photo with Priscila.

Back to the boat for a change of clothes in readiness for second snorkeling expedition. Firstly, we had a short walk over to a different beach to spot white-tipped shark from the shore. You couldn't see a lot (one shark) but we did see some more comical sea-lions (I have a video of one dreaming he is catching fish or similar). Eliot complained he thought there would be more shark. It was so tempting to get him to see this one up close and personal. Also a new-comer was the Galápagos hawk.*

The snorkeling was a bit better than yesterday (and colder!). Saw red and white fish and a sea-lion underwater. We all stayed only 15 mins as it was that cold and then went back aboard for tea and biscuits.

After lunch, we left Bartolomé en route for North Seymour which was about 3 hours away. I fell asleep in the sun again, my legs were soon the colour of a slapped arse, but still not as bad as Krys who has now started to blister.

We took the dinghy to the jetty of North Seymour. Dear God the sea was rough. We thought we would capsize a good number of times as the waves lashed over the sides of the boat. But it was well worth it. North Seymour was by far the spectacle of the cruise. The terrain is completely different to Bartolomé. The earth is dark red again and supported lots of plant life. As a result there were nearly every type of animal native to these islands. Our path was blocked by an enormous elephant seal who wasn't going to budge so we did the trail the other way around. The first thing we saw were nesting frigates. The red sack the males puff out on their chest is quite amazing. It is easily as big as a rugby ball. And it was quite easy to see the males spot the females (white chests) flying above. We took hundreds of photos as a group. We also saw some babies who look hilarious. They are big, have brown beaks and are covered in a downy fur which makes them look like teddy bears.

We also saw the blue-footed booby up close, it looks like it is wearing turquoise wellies and has very distinctive eyes and a blue beak. Al the animals seemed to pose for the camera. The most special event we were treated to was the booby courtship ritual in full...

  • 3 or so males encircle on female on the ground and then each in turn shows his best moves.
  • The first males strutted up and extended its wings to full span, then collected a twig and gave it to the female
  • Then did a funny dance by alternately swaying on either foot.

The female eventually went off with the one with the biggest car. No seriously, the female chose the first suitor who had actually backed off to a safe distance and looked shy, much to the delight of the female members of the party. The second suitor was far more raucous and he got nowhere. The seal was still there when we got back - he was bigger than Krys! Got back to the boat unscathed and packed up the bags. We have a ridiculously early start for the final island tomorrow at 6 AM when we visit Black Turtle Cove on Santa Cruz.

I had a list of all the animals I was hoping to see in these islands and I have seen them all. This is truly a great place. If you have a spare couple of grand I can definitely recommend it as a holiday destination.

Back on board we have two envelopes to fill with tips - one for Priscila and one for the crew. We all had a few beers and watched the sun set on the horizon next to a small volcano. It was beautiful and dare I say it romantic. Arch and Marie will have a great honeymoon here.

We had a farewell celebration before dinner and a toast from the captain. The chef had also baked a cake. I did the reply to the toast as the Capt. doesn't speak english. It was a bit forced with lots of "Gracias" and nouns I dragged up from somewhere. Dinner was paella, veg and salad and cake to follow. I had two pieces, Krys three.

We are already anchored opposite the cove so tonight should be a restful one.

* Please note for all those interested a lot of the animals are "Galapágos ----" as most of the wildlife is endemic to these islands. That is what makes it all so unique!

31st October - Galápagos Day 2

We sailed through the night and were now anchored off the west coast of Santa Cruz in a port called Puerto Agas. I slept really well (better than Quito). We are due to have breakfast at 7 every day. Got up early and left the snoring Krys to it. Had a brief chat in Spanish with the crew who were watching the news on TV. Walked around the boat a few times, considered doing some sit-ups but that is as far as I got. Had 2 cups of coffee. 6.50 - no sign of anyone. Ah. The Galápagos are 1 hour behind Quito. It is 5.50. Went back to bed.

Breakfast was great - fruit, ham, cheese, eggs, toast, sweet French toast, tea, coffee and juice. Seems a few of the oldies had complained to the chef about the omissions from last night.

Our first visit of the day was to Dragon's Hill. We had a dry landing (where you step off the front the dinghy onto a jetty or a flat rock) and wandered up the trail. The good thing about the trails is that they are not fabricated, there are no walkways or steps. Our first scheduled stop was to see a solitary flamingo in a lagoon searching for shrimp. It was such a peaceful setting. It is apparent my camera is inferior compared with the rest of the groups. Kennet had a digital SLR with a lens so long when he went to maximum zoom I thought he was going to knock the flamingo over! We also saw yellow land iguanas and about 5 species of bird (including oyster catchers, frigates, finches, boobies).

Lunch was as impressive as breakfast - all fresh salads, veg and bacallao (cod). I sat on a sun lounger as the boat set sail for Isla Santiago (St James island). I contemplated work in 2008. For a minute! Too much going on outside the boat. A frigate had landed on the dinghy and was the source of many photos and much amusement. Also I saw a huge ray jump out of the water like a large pair of Y-fronts but sadly I didn't get it on film.

Our second visit of the day was a wet landing (where you jump off the back of the dinghy into knee high water about 15 ft short of the sand). One girl fell in and drenched everything including her camera. She was very cross and miserable after the event. She wasn't much different dry either. Eliot made a point of going over to her and saying in some smarmy voice "I have it all on video if you want to see it". We walked on a sea trail for an hour and saw - marine iguanas lapping up the sun to raise their body temperature and spitting salt out of their noses. More birds tonnes (literally) of sea-lions and a single fur seal. The make-up of Santiago is much like the other islands and made of volcanic ash and rock. This coast line is black ash and very porous so there are a lot of blow holes and underground caves.

Got back to the beach for some snorkel action. They had hired wet-suits for us in Puerto Ayora and the boat had a supply of snorkels, flippers and masks. The water was absolutely brass monkeys and pretty murky. There is no way you could have gone in without neoprene protection. (still chuckling at pregnant Dan in Wales). I saw the least - just a few yellow and silver fish and lots of sea weed. As a group we collectively saw a ray and a sea turtle as well. Eliot and wife didn't go in. He was nursing a painful mouth and complaining about tooth-ache, ironic as he gives us all ball-ache. We got back aboard and were greeted with hot chocolate and cheese and ham toasties. Life at sea is great.

Had a few beers before dinner and after a meal of lasagne and salad I fell asleep in the lounge listening to stories of how IT has changed over the years. Woke up and retired to the cabin, the water is a bit more choppy tonight.

30th October - Galápagos Day 1

Five AM start today. Krys's snoring wasn't too bad. Nothing like Bob!

"The shower was sooooo good" and the breakfast buffet pretty good. It was a bit different as you can imagine in Quito. Roast chicken and choclo (big sweetcorn) being the main dish.

Flight to the Galápagos takes 3 hours with a mandatory stop (40 mins) in Guayaquil to refuel. There were 2 latinos on the flight and the rest were gringos.

We finally arrived in Baltra - the home of the Galápagos airport. Baking hot on the runway as we got off. Weather so much better than the drizzle we left in Quito. We went through immigration and paid the park fee of $100. After a bus a ferry to get to the island Santa Cruz and a 50 min coach ride we arrived in Puerto Ayora on the south coast of Santa Cruz. The geography changed quite a lot from North to South. It was blue sky and desert-like in the north (the earth is dark red, similar to Iguazú) and then became more lush and cloudier as we headed south. The coach was silent, everyone photographing the landscape.

We got on our dinghy and headed for the boat "The Gap Adventurer III" - our home for the next 4 days. The water is crystal clear and we saw a myriad of bright orange crab on the quay and some small lizards.

I am rooming with Krys again. Cosy room but has all mod cons including air-con. I gave him the bottom bunk, I didn't fancy that load shifty above me for 3 nights!

Lunch was spag bol and salad - tasty but wouldn't say the portions were great. Krys looked traumatised. We also met some others on the boat who were staying on. A Danish guy called Kennet and a couple from England. Now, I know on tours you have to be patient but I did find the English couple irritating from the off. He is a retired shop designer and picked faults in the boat, the food, the service etc. From this point on I will refer to him by a fictitious name. Any name chosen at random. Something like "Eliot". You'll hear a lot more about him soon.

After lunch we went back ashore to visit the Charles Darwin Research Station. CD spent 10 years writing his Origin of Species on the islands. Our guide was called Tony and very knowledgeable about the flora and fauna of the islands. We saw marine iguanas sunbathing (they are the ones that look like dragons on all the nature programmes) and giant tortoises - sadly the infamous "Lonesome George" was viewable from a distance and was sulking. The eponymous character is 110 years old and is lonesome because for 20 years they have being trying to find him a female mate of the same species but have failed thus far. There is a big operation at the station to revive the tortoise population which has declined over the years. Who knows, maybe my next job will be to work there.

I was impressed by the strict park rules in the Galápagos. You can't eat, you can't drink, you can't smoke. There is no litter. Ironic that the Galápagos is governed from Quito which has all of the above.

On the way back from the station we saw a fish market - there were scores of frigate birds trying to get a bite of tuna. These are the birds that puff their red chests out to attract a mate (see pictures). They are so much bigger than I imagined. Much bigger than the seagulls you see on the coast in Britain. We also saw blue-footed boobies from a distance dive into the sea to catch fish.

Popped into the supermarket on the way back to the quay to buy contingency Pringles in case dinner was on the small side.

When we go back to the boat we had a beer and waited for dinner while the sun set in the background. For dinner we had beef stew. It was indeed on the small side, the last in the queue got juice and no meat. The protestations being led by Eliot. We had instantly forgettable conversations during the meal. This trip won't be remembered for stimulating company. Most of the people either work or have worked in IT. Went back to the cabin after dinner and munched on Pringles and read my book. I took a Mareol in case of sea-sickness but as we left Puerto Ayora the water was quite calm.